Fake Movie Friday Vol 2: Mapping Daisies

Title comes from the wonderful Ashley at Pig Pile last night. I highly suggest going back into Vol 1 and reading her FMFs. They are weird. This title is weird. She is weird.

Mapping Daisies

Bud, an elderly man, wakes up from his bed slowly. On the side table there is an old picture of a woman holding a daisy. There are notes written in nice handwriting around his house reminding him to do certain things. He dresses moderately and picks up a corded phone. Next to the phone is a list of phone numbers and he dials the number labeled Walter Jr. His son answers the phone and he tells Walter that he needs a ride to city hall.

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Fake Movie Friday Vol 2: Saturday Matinee Club

Title from Tigs. Which actually stands for Titles Instantly Generated Simulator. Wait, did you think I’ve been talking about a real person all these weeks?

Saturday Matinee Club

We open midday in a cemetery. Everyone wears black as a priest talks about the dead. We are told that the deceased, Thomas, died young after a lengthy battle with cancer. The camera pans around the crowd as it talks about the friends of the deceased and we are given glimpses of the rest of the Saturday Matinee Club who are here to bury their friend.

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Fake Movie Friday Vol 2: Fangs

To be honest this is the first week of the new volume where I really don’t feel like doing this. But so close to a year! Title is from Tigs!

Fangs

We get a montage of all sorts of cool teens heading into high school. They do a lot of cliché cool teen stuff. We settle on one very uncool teen though. His name is Daniel but everyone calls him Fangs, because of his teeth. He has very sharp canines that look like fangs. I know you were confused so I explained it. He is a bit of an outcast.

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Movie Movie Podcast #72: (Stephen King’s) It

It must be Christmas because of all the podcasts we’ve been doing! Not because of the movie release schedule around then, because we’re giving you, the listeners, gifts. Well maybe the movie release schedule. Maybe both, it works on a lot of levels. Join Alex, Russ, Peter and myself as we talk about Stephen King’s It, mother!, American Assassin, The Lego Ninjago Movie, Patti Cakes, Wind River, Logan Lucky, Kingsmen: The Golden Circle, Annabelle: Creation and more on this episode of the Movie Movie Podcast. Recorded on October 2nd, 2017.

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Fake Movie Friday Vol 2: The Surgeon’s General

What comes next is an incredibly true story that I have spent the last few weeks researching. This practically isn’t a fake movie Friday because there are so many historical events retold how they happened. Granted the title was from Tigs but it is totally because I was sharing my research notes with him.

The Surgeon’s General

A young man wakes up to the sound of a rooster crowing and the sunlight coming through the window. He puts on his simple clothes and heads out of his simple home. The year is 1780 and the new country that is America is embattled in the war for independence. This is John Woodworth, a poor humble doctor.

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Fake Movie Friday Vol 2: Über Driver

Title comes from Pig Pile last night. I can’t say whether or not they meant it with the umlaut or not. I’ve chosen to include it because I think it will make for a more interesting movie.

Über Driver

A young couple get make out on the street. The girl looks pretty drunk and the guy is aggressive. A ride share service car pulls up and they get in. Things go down hill for the two and she starts to get angry with him. He is unrelenting and hits her. The car comes to a screeching halt. The guy yells about how the driver should stay out of their business before he is yanked out of the car and thrown across the street in the air with superhuman strength. The driver gets back in the car and asks her where she wants to be dropped off, in a thick German accent. He tells her that it will be free of charge and not to worry. Title card.

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Fake Movie Friday Vol 2: Christmas Comes Early

Let’s get ahead on this shit again. Tigs gave me a big long list of titles and I’m ready to rock after how disappointed I am after last week’s movie, which I didn’t even tweet out.

Christmas Comes Early

Ben is a hotshot Wall Street type. He lives in a fancy apartment in the city and does two things, makes money and bangs chicks. What he doesn’t do is care about anyone (off to a great start this week). It’s late November and he’s on the phone with his parents. He tells them that he won’t be able to make it to thanksgiving since he’s too busy. They are sad but things get worse when he then says that he probably won’t make Christmas either. He shrugs it off and heads out for the night. He returns home and passes out. As he does we hear sleigh bells.

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Fake Movie Friday Vol. 2: Flip It

Going upstate for a mini vacation. Getting this one done before then. I’ve really been slacking.

Flip it

We start with the opening theme song of a reality show circa 2007. The theme song is a play off of Devo’s “Whip It” with the word “whip” replaced with “flip”. Naomi is the star of the show. We see shots of homes before and after their renovations. Naomi talks about how she’s a single mother and how much that helps her to discipline contractors. It cuts to footage of her talking sternly to one of her kids then cuts to her taking the same tone with a roofer. In another cutaway Naomi talks about how she was barely scraping by but saw how much houses started to be sold for on her block and decided to change her career. The final shot is Naomi standing in front of her McMansion holding her littlest with the other three kids standing close by. She says “I’m finally living the American dream” as the camera pulls back.
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First FMF of the new school year!  I’m pretty beat so this will probably be very short/not good. But a year approaches! Title from the man who puts the give in title giver, Tigs.

Teach the Stars

We open late at night following a dark path up a hill. No one is around and we arrive at a giant telescope housed in an old observatory whose grounds are a bit disheveled. We fly into the rough and find a 60-something man named Martin. He sits looking through the telescope, the only one in the facility. He rubs his eyes a bit tired.

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Fake Movie Friday Vol 2: My Only Friend

Yet another movie written on a train this week. Title comes from Tigs who knows how Game of Thrones ends. Ask him!

My Only Friend

Black screen and we hear school sounds. A bell, lockers closing, slaps of high fives, and then finally teasing. We fade in but it is not a normal school. We see all sorts of different creatures. Some are furry, some with scales, different amounts of limbs, pretty much a ‘Monsters Inc’ type world. They are all picking on a large, orange, furry creature with the face of a lion. His name is Walter and he doesn’t have any friends.

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