Fake Movie Friday Vol 2: Sputnik

Got this one out in record time.


It’s 1957 in the USSR and Sergei wakes up a minute before his alarm goes off. He gets ready for the day. The camera is focused on his face as he moves about and a sad song is playing in the background (think of the beginning of BoJack). We see his wife Xenia in the background trying to calm down their two children. Sergei barely has any emotions. He gets to work and he sits down behind his desk, exhales and smiles.

There are blueprints and rocket models all over his desk. He has a large office. One of his coworkers knocks on his door. Sergei greets him warmly. The coworker (Georgi) has a grave look on his face and says he has been hearing some scary rumors about a change of priorities from the higher ups. Sergei tells him not to worry, that everything is on schedule and he is sure everything will be fine.
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Fake Movie Friday Vol 2: Ice Cream Socialite

Title from Tigs after he gave me a couple Fate of The Furious flavored ones. I don’t think I’m ready to open that can of worms so here we go instead.

Ice Cream Socialite

Clarissa wakes up in her fancy NYC park side penthouse. Her older husband is already in a suit ready to head to work. He tells her that he will be out of town for a day or two. They have a discussion that borders on argument that they have clearly done before about how she is bored but he doesn’t want her to work. We get the sense that she has bigger ideas and dreams. She heads out to the park and runs into a huge line of people at an ice cream cart.

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Fake Movie Friday vol 2: Missile Command

Yeah yeah I’m a day late, but I didn’t want to skip too weeks in a row. This is basically the Last Starfighter but inspired but very recent events.

Missile Command

Aisha a high school student is playing Missile Command on an arcade cabinet. It’s clearly the 80s from the clothing and they are playing ‘Come On Eileen’ on the pizza shop’s sound system. She is getting the high score but the missiles start moving too fast and she gets a game over.
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Fake Movie Friday Vol 2: The Master’s Master

Let’s get right into this one. This is something I say when I don’t quite have an idea yet but I want to start typing. Title comes from a list Tigs texted me last week on a plane.

The Master’s Master

Peng is a young Chinese teen studying Kung Fu in a time that comes before now (zero research y’all). He is the star pupil out of a very small group training with Master Zhou. His best friend is Luke, a white European because Hollywood is afraid this movie won’t make money without one.

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Fake Movie Friday Vol 2: Sheep’s Clothing

I’m writing this on a plane! I’ve now written FMFs on trains, in cars, in bars, on the toilet, and now a plane. I need to write one on a boat next. Also this plane has the Arnold classic ‘The Running Man’ so I’m having the best time. Did you know: The Running Man takes place in 2017? Title is from Tigs who is about 8 rows behind me.

Sheep’s Clothing

Kara is driving her car through a terrible storm. She passes a sign that says ‘State Penitentiary’. The storm knocks her off the road and a tornado is seen in the distance.

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Fake Movie Friday Vol 2: Roswell

I’m on call this week so I don’t have any excuse to not write a fake movie. This was a fun one to write.


Titles say ‘June 21 1947’
They fade out and are replaced by the text, ‘Washington’

Harold Dahl sees six UFOs in the sky.
The next day there is a knock at his door. He opens it revealing two men in black suits.

‘June 24 1947

Kenneth Arnold sees a UFO on his daily nature walk.

‘June 14 1947
New Mexico’
William Brazel is riding a horse. In the distance he sees a UFO crash land.
He rids off to investigate. As he approaches the crash site his horse is spooked and bucks him off. In a daze he stumbles further towards the wreckage. Something grabs him and he screams
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Fake Movie Friday Vol 2: Crime Brûlée

It’s only week 19 and I’m already debating about how long I will be doing this for. Luckily I got some titles from Tigs and he threw this absolute gem at me and I’m energized.

Crime Brûlée

Chef Harold is the talk of the town. He is a famous dessert chef who does guest spots at fancy restaurants and talk shows. He is working on opening his own line of shops. He returns home to his fancy apartment to find his younger brother Todd waiting for him. Todd is a career criminal and is coming to Harold for money. Harold sends him away when he learns it’s for putting a job together.

Shortly after this night Harold is meeting with his financial advisor when he learns Mr. McGuffin, a wealthy investor of his has used him and stolen the money for the shops. Harold is angry and ignored by McGuffin who says it was just business. Harold flirts with McGuffin’s sexy assistant. Harold is lost for a solution until he realizes that he should track down his brother. That maybe crime is the answer.

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Fake Movie Friday Vol 2: Brothers in Crime

It’s St. Patrick’s day and I’m trying to get this done before going out. I was sick last week and missed writing a fake movie but I’m not missing this week!

Brothers in Crime

1914 Chicago
Mikey and Bert are 10 and 8 respectively. We see them in a one room classroom. Mikey is being disruptive. The teacher says that if he doesn’t follow the rules he won’t amount to anything. We cut to the kids playing. Mikey is very rambunctious and picks on the littler kids but always defends his brother. We cut to the brothers at a corner store. Mikey steals some baseball cards.

1934. The brothers are now adults. Mikey has continued in his way and has begun to rob banks. He is buying expensive cars and has a beautiful girlfriend. Mikey is always nice to Bert but it is clear that Bert is envious of his lifestyle. He has always been a law abiding man but he has had enough and decides to rob a bank.
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Fake Movie Friday Vol. 2: Lemonade Factory

Title from Adam at the show last night. He kept shouting it out and Pete kept ignoring him, so I’m taking it upon myself to do this one. I honestly have no idea what to do with this one, I probably should have done something like all the people in the town are disappearing and it turns out they are making lemonade out of people, but instead…

Lemonade factory

The movie starts off with a bunch of workers going to a dock hoping to be called for work, it’s kind of like Cinderella Man but they are all hoping to get work at the local lemonade factory. Our main character, Jared, get’s the word and goes to the factory. There’s a conveyor belt with lemons on them, Jared picks up on at a time, puts the lemons into a squeezer, squeezes out the juice, puts the used lemon back onto a conveyor belt  and there is a stack of used lemons that it falls onto at the end.

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Fake Movie Friday Vol 2: Pot Hole

Title from Pig Pile last night means no more board games. I may not have work today but my dad is staying at my place and finding time for this may be difficult. He’s in the shower. Let’s bang some of this out. This film will also try and solve racism, but in a terrible Gran Torino style.


Title card is displayed on a black screen as we hear cars going by. We start to hear the scraping of metal and clanks of them hitting potholes. An old grizzled man, Franklin, awakens in his bed to the noise. He looks annoyed as he slowly gets himself up and dressed. His house is tidy but bland. He sits down to make a phone call and the 311 operator, Derek, recognizes his voice. They chat as he complains again about the pothole as he does every morning. The two seem to have a friendship.

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