Tag Archives: mads mikkelsen

Fake Movie Friday – The Family Ink

Dudes.  It’s been a really long time since there’s been a shitty movie about tattoos.  Hang on there hasn’t been one ever? Ok well I just made one.  This would be directed that guy who made 21.  A piece of shit movie that made way more money than it should have.

Forest Green, played by Viggo Mortensen is a world famous Tattoo artist.  People from all over the world come to his parlor Green in Bay Ridge, Brooklyn because they want the best.  And he is the best.  There is a sequence early on that shows how flashy and great with an ink gun he is and it plays like a scene from Cocktail.  Everyone knows he’s the best.  He has no friends and family cause the only family he needs is his gun.  While he might be the best ever, time has passed him by.  He never adjusted tattoo prices and as a result, is falling behind on his rent for Green.  Also there is a new chain of Tattoo parlors in Williamsburg, Brooklyn, I.D. that has been poaching business from him, and Logan Miller, played by Garrett Hedlund is one of their hottest guns.  Irwin Dean Miller, played by Henry Czerny (I.D.), is the brainchild behind the new tattoo parlors, and he is Logan Miller step-father.  He has turned the tattoo biz into a sterile, family friendly enterprise.  The creativity that has once been the staple of the tattoo parlor is gone, replaced with calculating efficiency and almost no care for the process.

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