Tag Archives: Ashley

Fake Movie Friday Submissions: The Clock

Ashley Carter’s weekly reminder that she is in fact a crazy person:

Hi Guys,

So apparently I just write the material movies are based on now. This will one day be made into a coming of age movie. Or maybe an experimental film done entirely from household objects’ points of view. Enjoy!

The Clock

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Fake Movie Friday Submissions: Fred

ASHLEY is back to remind you how crazy and weird her movie are. In case you forgot.

Hey guys! Sorry it’s so short and that this is the first one in a month and a half. I think from now on when I write fake movies, they are going to rhyme. Hope that’s okay!


Here’s a tale from New York
that starred an adorable dork
who is now so dismally dead.
He lived alone with his cat
in a small downtown flat.
His name was poor, pitiful Fred.

Sit back and I’ll tell you
about this poor fellow,
and his beastly beaus three.
He slit his own throat
in a rusty old boat
in the bay, down by the sea.

Now let’s rewind a few months
and consider the cunts
that lead poor Fred astray.
Each supplied a knife,
and a world full of strife.
that drove poor Fred to the bay.

There was Darla, of course,
who looked like a horse!
But we can’t really blame her for that.
She wooed him, and screwed him,
and downright abused him.
Then the bitch ran away with his cat.

We can’t forget Carry,
who was just a bit scary,
and incredibly, enormously fat.
Turns out her desires
were more to start fires,
particularly in his quaint little flat.

And finally Christine,
the beauty queen,
who came into his life with a strut.
Her face was sweeter than honey,
when she ran off with his money,
the gold digging, two-timing slut.

Our hero, bereft,
was sadly left,
feeling very small.
He walked onto the dock
and heard the gulls squawk.
And there he ended it all.

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Fake Movie Friday Submissions: The Wife of Bath

Ashley returns again with possibly the most creative Fake Movie Friday we’ve seen. After two weeks of strange murder tails she comes in to try and show that she is more intelligent than us. Enjoy!

This fake movie friday is inspired by, and loosely based on, Chaucer’s “Wife of Bath” tale in The Canterbury Tales. With Frankenweenie coming out, I thought it would be fun to make this one stop motion as well. It is set at some point in the past, with the a family living in a small two bedroom cottage, in a small town, possibly in the UK or New England.

The Wife of Bath
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Fake Movie Friday Submissions: Melody

Ok, Ashley may be a little crazy. Here is her delightfully weird story of murder and dogs.

Because I don’t want to live in a world where this isn’t a movie I get to watch whenever I’m feeling a little blue, I bring you

by Ashley Carter

We open on a couple played by Kristen Connolly (our titular character) and some unknown actor we’ll call Boyfriend 1. Melody is an intelligent, funny, and easygoing woman. She owns an adorable medium-sized dog named Basil and clearly has great circle of friends, a great job, etc. The soundtrack to this movie will be upbeat as we follow Melody through her life/adventures in dating.
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