Tag Archives: universal

Kate Beckinsale is The Mummy (Probably)

Len Wiseman has been hired to shepherd the reboot of The Mummy franchise.  Apparently the studio wants to take the series in an entirely different and darker direction, so they hired Wiseman.  So far, if we are keeping score at home, Len Wiseman created and directed the vastly underwhelming Underworld series, he directed the infinitely dumb Live Free or Die Hard, and he directed the remake bomb of the summer Total Recall.  There are two common threads in Len Wiseman movies;  Kate Beckinsale (his wife), and life-less set pieces.  Maybe life-less is what a Mummy film needs? Probably not.

I am at my wits end with Hollywood.  I get that monster movies will continually be revised and released etc, but why are we attaching hacks to projects that could be great.  Say what you want about Stephen Sommers’ Mummy films, but at least they were fun.  No they weren’t be any stretch the definitive Mummy film, but they were fun adventure films that killed time.  Len Wiseman can only make lense-flare filled action scenes with his wife front and center.  Nothing he has made gives me confidence this is a good idea.  What I can tell you is that Wiseman is the perfect director for a studio that doesn’t want to take risks.  He can make your movie on time, on a lower budget, and he wont be a problem to work with!  I’m sure he’s a nice guy, but we have to stop giving this guy major franchises.  He can’t do it.  He can film is wife’s butt awesomely though.

I think every studio should just stop and think WWGDTD (What Would Guillermo Del Toro Do?) when thinking about starting a new sci-fi/horror franchise.

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Reboot-O-Tron Decides to Remake VIDEODROME

Videodrome is a 1983 classic techno-horror film starring James Woods as a Canadian TV exec who starts pirating a channel that shows real killings, snuff film style.  It gets very popular and a bunch of weird shit happens.  It’s basically a cautionary tale about TV only David Cronenberg made it, so you know it’s weirder than anything.

Well, Universal Studios have decided to reboot/remake or whatever the fuck they plan on calling it to Videodrome.  They even hooked a music video director to helm it, Alan Berg.

Problems:

1.  This didn’t need to be remade.

2.  David Cronenberg is a genius-level weirdo.  Unless he wanted to go back to that world, theres no reason to go back

3.  All of the creepiness, will most likely be replaced with slick visuals.

4. Being able to direct a commercial or music video should not give you carte blanche to direct a heady sci-fi horror epic with lots of moralistic ideas about media.

I’m assuming Universal’s thought is that the original is 30 years old almost, so they can re-release it on blu-ray around the time they get the new one up and running in theaters.  I saw the original years ago when I was too young to even understand it, but it creeped me out to no end.  Movies don’t creep people out like that anymore.  I’ll bet they even try and neuter it by making it PG-13.

David Cronenberg must be pissed about this while he drinks his Molson.

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The Bourne Legacy Trailer and the Case of the Good Sequel-Boot

I am excited for this movie.  By placing it directly within the timeline of the Jason Bourne films they aren’t absolutely shitting on our intelligence.  Jeremy Renner looks very capable to take over for Matt Damon.  Universal reallllllly needs this to do well.  Battleship tanked, and Snow White is a big gamble.

Check out the newest trailer here!

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