Fake Movie Friday: Stargazer

Too often now a days I have no idea what to write and I just come back to writing the same movie I’ve written dozens of times before. So why should this week be any different?? I’m in some hot water at work right now, I’ll have to make this a quick one. Colm gave me some title suggestions, but I’m ignoring all of them. We also talked about the end of Mass Effect 3 and he mentioned the final scene and this character, so this movie will be titled:


We start in 2005, before the financial crisis. Jeff is the president of some big Wall Street firm that is doing incredible well. There are parties, lots of drugs, and it’s a crazy time. Jeff is going wild, everyone loves him, it’s a great time.

Flash forward two years and we’re in the middle of the financial crisis. Three of the top members of the firm have killed themselves and Jeff is the one left with the blame. There are people out for blood and he is trying to calm everything down as best he can. He is thrust into meetings immediately upon leaving his office, lawyers and judges are grilling him, he has no peace, no quiet and the whole world hates him.

On the train he is berated, when he get’s back to his neighborhood he sees people moving and abandoning their homes as they scowl at him. His life is now this and nothing more. He is in front of courts answering for his companies decisions, as well as his dead former co-workers.

On the way home from work he sees a man get into his car, with a big “For Sale” sign on it. The man is a bit odd, kind of an old cooky type, but much younger. He speaks in riddles mostly. He ends up giving the car to Jeff as long as he “drives it to the stars.”

Jeff jumps in and decides to go on a road trip across country. On his way he finds cross dressing gnomes who are actually gnomes and not little people, he drives the car down a roller coaster, he drops peyote and pushes the car across three state lines but believe himself to be saving an arc full of 2 of every vegetable, picks up two hitch hikers who all resemble co-workers who had killed themselves in sort of A Christmas Carol thing. He spends each of the nights that he picks these hitch hikers up talking with them int he middle of the desert looking at the stars and talking about what happened, how it could be fixed, if it needs to be fixed, or if this is just a natural evolution and maybe meant to happen. In the morning they are gone. And the odometer reads 1000 miles less than it was.

This whole time there is a country-wide APB looking for Jeff.

Finally Jeff picks up a last hitch hiker who looks like the only other dead co-worker. This hitchhiker tells him whats happening and that he is public enemy #1, the whole world hates him, etc, and Jeff cannot take it. He tells him it’s this confrontation that he’s trying to get away from. He is told he cannot run from this problem. He tells Jeff that there is a roadblock 2 miles ahead and it’s up to him, run through it, or give himself up.

So Jeff stops, thinks, gets out of his car, then gets back in, revs up and drives straight into the roadblock, exploding in a crazy spectacle. There is only one body in the car when they check, and it’s that of the ex coworker.

I guess?


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