Author Archives: russ

Kevin Nash & The Big Sexy Screen Renaissance

Kevin Nash is one of the most popular professional wrestlers of the mid to late 90’s and early 00’s.  He was apart of many major storylines and was awesome.  In his career he’s dabbled in films as Super Shredder in TMNT2 and as an evil guard in Adam Sandler’s The Longest Yard.  Now it seems like we are (or at least I am) experiencing a renaissance of sorts for the man as he appeared in Rock of Ages as a bouncer, and will be in Magic Mike playing a stripper named Tarzan.  In Magic Mike, which is going to be a hit, it seems like he’ll actually get something to do as he’s getting billed in the trailer.

Currently he’s in talks for a role in The Hunger Games: Catching Fire.  That’s a huge step up for the man.  I am assuming that the role in question would either be a guard of some sort, but it makes more sense for him to be Brutus, one of the older victors of the Hunger Games who volunteers for the Quarter Quell.  He’ll never be a megastar, but I’d like to see him keep getting roles like this where he gets to be a little more than just the guard in the background.

Tagged , ,

Kevin James & the Inspirational Sports Drama?

When I first heard that Kevin James was going to be in a movie playing a teacher who decides to start MMA fighting to make money for his failing school, I thought, “this is going to be a typical happy madison shitbird.” Then I saw the trailer for his film Here Comes The Boom and thought “Ok, it’s not happy madison, but its still shit.”

It’s like someone knew that while Warrior bombed, it was a good enough film, so why not toss in some comedy, some fat guy falling, and watch the money pile up.  I don’t think this will be good at all, but I think it will certainly do well.  The tone of this trailer is all over the place, but I doubt that’ll matter.

I still hate MMA though.

Trailer:

Tagged , , , ,

Lego Batman & Superman In One Movie Together?

Lego: The Piece of Resistance is going to be a movie.  Legos.  It’s happening.  We are finally hitting that point where anything can be a movie.  I’m anxiously awaiting Crocs: The Movie inspired by Crocs The Shoes now.

But anyway this movie is going to be live action/animation hybrid and is going to star Chris Pratt as the lead character, and Will Arnett as Lego Batman.  Channing Tatum is also in talks to be Lego Superman.  I honestly think this is kind of awesome.  It’s going to be directed by Phil Lord and Christopher Miller (Clone High, Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs, 21 Jump Street) and Chris McKay (Robot Chicken).   I can’t think of better people to bring the Lego world to life in a fun way.

Continue reading

Tagged , , , , , , ,

Greek Gods & How Hollywood Wants More?

The legend of Greek Demi-God Theseus is being made into a film tentatively titled Theseus.

“Wait, didn’t I already see that movie two years ago or this year when it was called Clash/Wrath of the Titans?” No you didn’t that was about PERSEUS.

“Wait, didn’t I already see that movie last winter when it was called Immortals?” You saw Immortals? Thats weird.  Well then yea you kinda did I guess.

Those are probably the questions that most people would ask when they hear that Hollywood is prepping a big-budget film highlighting that time Theseus fought a Minotaur.

Continue reading

Tagged , , , , , , ,

Popeye & How Sometimes I Zig Where I’d Zag

They are making a new Popeye film.  Typically I would be annoyed about this, because it’s yet another adaptation that I feel is unnecessary.  Like it’s not like we need the untold story of Popeye at this point, or like he is even a very popular character these days, but for some reason, I am slightly intrigued by this.  I loved Popeye growing up and the character has been gone long enough to actually come back and have some people care.  I worry though if a weird talking guy who eats spinach and punches the shit out of people would go over well in today’s PC days, but if they keep true to the roots it’ll be cool.

The best news about the film is that its going to be directed by Genndy Tartakovsky.  The dude who made Powerpuff Girls, Samurai Jack, and Dexter’s Lab.  All awesome cartoons that were hyper stylized and smart enough for an adult to enjoy as well.  While Hotel Transylvania is his next film, and it’s got a very heavy Happy Madison feel to it from the casting, I still think there is hope that it could just be a funny movie with cool monsters.

Anyway you slice it, I think there is a market for a Popeye film if they strike the right tone.  I’m assuming of course it will be computer animated.

Tagged , , , , , ,

Alex Cross & Dressing Up Like Daddy!

The trailer for Alex Cross (reboot of the Along Came a Spider and Kiss The Girls films) is here.  In the books by James Patterson, Alex Cross is a bad ass cool detective.  Idris Elba LOST this role to Tyler Perry.  Tyler Perry.  TYLER PERRY!  The funniest part of the this trailer to me isn’t all the dialogue where it sounds like Tyler Perry is trying to sound like his father, but instead when they show the names for the actors in the film and Tyler Perry’s flashes on the screen, and you realize it isn’t for a horrible comedy, but for an action thriller.   Dude doesn’t even have muscles!  Matthew Fox took over in the muscle department for this film it appears.

This movie could have been awesome if they replaced Madea with Stringer Bell/Luther

Check it out!:

Tagged , , , ,

“It’s like Die Hard only in the White House”

“It’s like Die Hard, only in a ______” is an oft-used phrase.  It’s an easy way to get people to visualize what you are trying to pitch.  Now Die Hard in the White House is going to happen.  TWICE.  Not even a month ago I wrote a post about all the dueling concept movies that come out.  Now we have two dueling Die Hard in the White House Projects.  Lets compare them both:

Continue reading

Tagged , , , , , , ,

Keanu Reeves & The Return of Realism?

Keanu Reeves has a really interesting film history.  He’s been in so many films, a lot of which did very well, but you would never consider him the strength of anything he’s done.  That’s fine, because he’s entirely likable, so I for whatever reason, root for him.  Also he was at the same restaurant as me at a friends birthday party and totally sang along to the happy birthday song for her, so that was cool.  Anyway, he’s starting to work on his directorial debut title The Man of Tai Chi.  It sounds like it will probably be an ass-kicking film, which I think he can do fine.  What I have seen however is that he is working on revolutionizing close quarters combat with a roving a camera.  Basically it looks like a giant camera rig that will be able to capture camera angles often left to CGI.  This is cool because it will be able to capture continuous shots from multiple angles without CGI or multiple cameras.

He’s got a small demo of it on youtube and it looks awesome.  I like that he’s taking steps for us to move back to practical effects in films.  We can all agree the practical effects do a much better job of immersing a viewer in the films world, than tons of CGI.  Hope it works for you Keanu!

Tagged , ,

Fake Movie Friday – Grand Pliè

That show on ABC Family, Bunheads, is about Ballet and is doing well, so why not make a Ballet movie? That is where today’s film comes from.

The movie begins with a group of women rushing to Grand Central station.  We don’t know what the hurry is, but we see as one of them checks her watch that it’s 4:55pm.  When they finally arrive at the station, they spread out, and begin to gracefully pickpocket commuters leaving work and heading to their trains.  They have extremely elegant movements.  Some would even think they were Ballet dancers their leaps, pliès and motions are so graceful.  Anyway, they get back to their loft-like hideout, and their leader Stitch, played by Michelle Rodriguez, says they need to do better.  They only got $1,000 which will only last the 5 of them for another month.  They need to start getting better.  We see one of the girls, Mira, played by Chloe Moretz doesn’t look happy.  She says, isn’t there another way we could make money?  Stitch has a long monologue about how she found Mira when she was abandoned years ago by her foster parents and raised her as her own.  This is the only life she knows, and the only life she’ll ever know. The other nondescript, but racial diverse girls tell Mira to just relax, and they all get the stretching and taking off their dancer shoes or whatever.

Continue reading

Tagged , , , , , ,

Fake Movie Friday Submissions – Crispus Attucks: Troll Hunter

Hey Dudes, it’s Fake Movie Friday yet again, so I figured we’d start things off with a submission from a very good friend of Priest and the Beekeeper, Tarik Davis.  He’s written a filmed an excellent short video that sums up almost exactly how we feel films are made these days.  Also, with Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter coming out in theaters today, this couldn’t be more appropriate.

Check out his video and trailer here!:

Tagged , , , ,