Author Archives: johnnytigs

Fake Movie Friday: HackBus: Air Force One 2

Alright, Alex and I are currently on the bus to Boston for PAX East. While waiting in line for the ride this morning we started stumbled upon an idea for a movie that we decided had to be written. With that, I give you:

HackBus: Air Force One 2

The movie opens with the end of Air Force One. We see Harrison Ford, as president James Marshall, kicking Gary Oldman out of the plane. The public loved James and wants him to be president forever, but he decided to step down after his first term and not run again. There are news programs and papers that are shown in vignettes that tell the history of the world since then. Much of Eastern Europe has formed under the monicker of nUSSR, the US’s economy keeps getting worse, pollution has gotten so bad that air travel is no longer available and Smart Busses have taken over as a clean and fuel efficient way to travel, and people are once again calling for James Marshall to take up a non-consecutive second term in office. They say he’s the only one who can bring the economy back and the nUSSR wants to sign a peace treaty but not with the current president. James runs and wins by a landslide.

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Movie Movie Podcast #35: StOZker

Alright, this could be my worst title (to date). The last remnants of snow have vanished from the bustling city streets, which can only signify one thing: a new Movie Movie Podcast! Join Peter, Russ, Alex and myself as we discuss Stoker and Oz the Great and Powerful. Recorded on March 13th 2013.

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Fake Movie Friday: Post It

Some dude said I looked like Lena Dunham last night. I thought that was kind of weird, yet apropos after looking in a mirror. You know what else is sure to be weird? My Fake Movie Friday! Colm comes through again with yet another banger title:

Post It

Frank is a professional gossip blogger. He has built his life on muck raking from some of hollywoods finest, but has never had his own big story break before. Most of the time he is just piggy backing off of other, more well known and renowned gossip sites and publications.

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Movie Movie Podcast #34: Jack the Giant Snitch

The slump has finally caught up with us. We may have no energy throughout this podcast, but you should have been there for the bits before and after I recorded. It was pretty funny. Join Alex, Pete, Russ and myself as we begrudgingly make our way through Jack the Giant Slayer and Snitch. Recorded on March 6th 2013.

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Fake Movie Friday: KGBee: The Sting Operation

Colm comes through again with what I think is his best title yet. It got pretty punny in our gchat conversation today and with that I bring you:

KGBees: The Sting Operation

The Hive, KGBee headquarters, 0600 hours. Queen Bee, known as Q, has called in her best agent, John Carpenter, to take on what could be the most deadly case of his career. With information from the CIAnts about a new plot to take over the world by the Termiban, who has been working with rogue anti-nationalists M.A.N.T.I.S (The Malevolent, Anarchistic, Nihilistic Truants of Insect Society), led by Maximilien Robeespierre, to infiltrate the Republic of Insectica and bring it to it’s knees with biological weaponry; germ warfare.

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Fake Movie Friday: Hard Reboot

Colm gave me the title and helped out with the ideas, though I forgot most everything we talked about specifically and was too lazy to check out our Gchat conversation. I do love this title:

Hard Reboot

The year is 2245 and the world is united. We no longer rely on oil, coal, gas or other forms of current unclean energy and instead are using the perpetual rotation of the Earth to generate unlimited energy with a device we call The Core, which sits below the Earths surface. Automatons and humans live together in harmony, the robots are responsible for much of the manual labor. Without warning a giant ship appears over the earth and begins to drain the energy from The Core and have taken control of it. The robots stop working, factories are ground to a halt, most electronics no longer work (but there are still some battery-powered things), and the world is in a panic.

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Fake Movie Friday: Tramp Stamp Collector

Looks like I’m working late on a Friday night, so I might as well use a bit of this time to write my FMF. I’m thinking this is like Cabin in the Woods meets The Apparition meets Resident Evil Extinction. I asked for a suggestion at last nights Pig Pile (were you there? You should have been) and the title I got was:

Tramp Stamp Collector

We open on the bloodshot eye-ball of a victim, Lindsay. She appears to have just woken up and starts to look around. She is beaten, bloodied and wearing a bikini. The room she is in has a very cold, steal feel about it, similar to something you would find in the Saw series. Just to drive that point home, as we pull out from Lindsay’s frame we see the bodies of multiple girls, all of similar ages, laying dead on the floor. Some decapitated bodies, etc, smash cut to the title screen. Continue reading

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Movie Movie Podcast #33: A Good Day To Talk About The Oscars

The Academy Awards are only a few days away, so it’s time you hear the REAL winners from us, the Movie Movie Podcast. Spoiler: Lockout wins EVERYTHING (double spoiler: that’s not true). Oh right, we talk about the new Die Hard too. Join Alex, Russ, Peter and myself as we share our opinions about the nominees for the 85th Academy Awards and very quickly say some shit about A Good Day to Die Hard. Recorded on February 20th 2013.

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Fake Movie Friday: Mirror Image

Ice-T has a new book coming out, his first foray (is that the right word?) into the world of fiction writing, in May titled Mirror Image that I just got a advance copy of. Colm then suggested I use that title for my FMF this week. So I bring you:

Mirror Image

Some high school, Middle America. Stacey is completely uncool. Half of the time it seems like there is no reason for it. Her friend Heather is extraordinarily popular with everyone. When Heather is in a group of people, Stacey will just leave them be and maybe wave. Heather’s friends will always make fun of Stacey, but Heather defends her though she won’t stop hanging out with those people. Stacey is a brunette, short, stocky, with curly hair, acne, glasses and brown eyes. Heather is a medium height blonde with pale blue eyes, straight hair and perfect complexion.

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Fake Movie Friday Submissions: The Littlest Werewolf

Hurray! Lisa LoFaso has submitted her first Fake Movie Friday! Thanks Lisa! Keep ’em coming:
So I gave this premise to Tigs around Halloween but he said I had to write it and I never finished it. So now, here is my first attempt at a Fake Movie Friday. Hopefully it doesn’t suck too bad.
The Littlest Werewolf