Hi Friends! As I’m sure you heard this Friday marks the 52nd Fake Movie Friday, thus completing one year. I’m going to take a day from each week to celebrate this year. First up is Peter! You know, me. Let’s take a look. This is your chance to read through some old ones and pretend you were there the whole time.
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So I was wrong, this is only #51 so next week marks one year of Fake Movie Fridays. This title comes from Brian Fitzpatrick, a simple man if not bland gentleman. Well at least I think this is what he said. Wow, this turned out long.
Cauliflower Revisited
Movie opens on a child on a bus staring over a seat. His mother pulls him down and tells him to stop staring. He sits back as the camera pans over the seat and past a cauliflower eared man. The woman apologizes for her son and says, “Wait aren’t you William? Tom and Cindy’s kid? I was real sorry to hear.” William simply nods and turns toward the window.
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So I was challenged to do this. I don’t back down. So here it is, my unofficially sequel to ‘The Indian in the Cupboard.’ Mike Stevens, I hope you are happy.
The Negro in the Cupboard
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Yet another night in which I’m in bed trying to get to sleep early and almost jump up to a start that I forgot it was Fake Movie Friday. Here comes number 49.
Breakdown
Movie starts with a montage playing with the opening credits. We see a woman talking to the camera breaking up with an unseen person, boss firing them, doctor telling them that they have cancer, insurance guy saying that his policy wouldn’t cover treatment, and a mail man saying he ran over his dog. We hear him scream as the title shows.
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I got home at 5 today. It is a glorious day. I haven’t really had a chance to enjoy the weather. Thus I’m on the couch with pajama pants on writing this piece of trash. Ok, 2+ hours later and I’m finally writing this after starting the intro.
His Secrets
Movie starts off with two women having brunch (peter movie plot twist!). Our main character, Eve, talks with her friends about her relationship problems. Sue, her friend, laughs off Eve’s self-deprecating jokes. Sue tells her to keep her chin up because her luck will soon change.
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I got home a few hours ago and said “Oh I should write my Fake Movie Friday.” 3 hours later I’m starting it. Idiot… Also this movie is bad. I’m off my game.
Shovel
Quick cuts as a group of bikers tears into town. They smash into a bank and rob it. They do it violently, shooting a guard. They mean business and are not to be fucked with. Tear right out of town.
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How did I forget it was Fake Movie Friday? 40-something Fridays in a row (yes and one Saturday) I have written one, and this week I just totally forget? So I have 13 minutes to write this. Let’s do it.
Fighting Midnight
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Lets get this thing done! Another work and straight to Scatterbomb night and I am beat. Today’s title is courtesy of something they had written on the white board behind them.
…And Everything Nice
Foggy night, drunk guy and girl walk down the street. They kiss and he is trying for more but she pushes him off. He complains and she runs off behind an old abandon house. They find a swing set and she jumps on. He trips on his way to her and lays on the ground as she laughs at him. He realizes he can no longer hear her and starts to get up. She is gone and he hears the sounds of a little girl laughing. He turns and there is a girl in front of him. He asks her if she’s ok. She charges at him.
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Holy crap this looks good. Good enough to get me to break my streak of nothing but Fake Movie Friday posts. Too bad the trailer has premiered as the same day as Hangover 3, which we will not be sharing on this site.
I want to see this so badly. It looks fantastic. I can’t wait. I watch this trailer and can’t help but think about how bad ‘The Great Gatsby’ looks compared to this film made in black and white by Joss Whedon. He shot it at his own home with a bunch of his friends.
It seems like since you can’t turn on the TV without seeing a preview for ‘21 & Over.’ It was the same thing last year with ‘Project X.’ Companies keep shitting out these teen party movies and advertising them to death. They cost little and make it all back getting 16 year olds excited. I’m going to try one. Title based on a line from the Workaholics ep I am watching.
Aloha to the Luau
Our main character Jay wakes up to a big breakfast made for him by his mother and father (CLASSIC PETE OPENING!). Next to his plate is a letter from Harvard. His mom already opened it. He got in and his parents are elated. He seems to not care that much and faking his smile. His parents say they can’t wait to tell everyone at the big block luau that night.
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