Author Archives: johnnytigs

Aug 24 2012
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Fake Movie Friday

Fake Movie Friday: Dill Kill

This is going to be really weird. I brainstormed this one with Andrew and Ashley today at lunch, after Ashley gave the suggestion of “pickle.”

Dill Kill

We open on Phil, a pickle artisan. We see him shoving something into a brine. His son is watching him in the corner. We see a porcupine in a cage also watching Phil.

“Come here, pickles.”

Both his son and the porcupine look, but Phil is only interested in the porcupine. We see Phil trying to shove the porcupine into a pickling jar. The son watches.  Continue reading →

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Aug 21 2012
Movie Movie Trailers

Less Is More: Natalie’s Lose Lose Trailer

(At least) Half of this 1 minute and 2 second long trailer is just a blank screen, with either a woman screaming for help behind darkness or a Saw-esque phone conversation. Natalie’s Lose Lose, Eric Williford’s first foray into directing, looks to be a torture-porn/kidnapping story, also not unlike Saw. There was no gore to speak of in the trailer, so who knows what the final product will be. I don’t know how I feel about this movie yet, honestly. It looks interesting but also a bit tired. Some of the scenes seem a bit more stylized than your typical gore-fest, which is always a welcome change of pace. But the simplicity of this trailer is what sells me on it. I dreamed about a trailer similar to this (for a Fake Movie Friday I’ve done recently) and the sparse nature of this trailer has completely sold me.

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Aug 20 2012
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Movie Movie News

What Are You Doing For the Next 2 and 1/2 Minutes?

Watching this incredible feat of editing by youtube user kidziakandkeogh of 163 (or 162, or 190 depending on how you count it) Horror Movies with a killer backing song by Hanni El Khatib. I saw this first on bloody-disgusting.com but felt the need to bring it to the MMP community who might not have seen it already. Andrew Dunn, I’m talking to you (though you probably saw it already).

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Aug 17 2012
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Fake Movie Friday

Fake Movie Friday: Midnight Globe Trouters

I asked for a suggestion of a movie title last night at the show to write for today. I couldn’t have asked for a better title, too bad the movie is going to be awful! It will be a hybrid animated / live action à la Cool World.

Midnight Globe Trouters

Holly, Jack and Frank (yeah those are the names of the main characters from Cool World) have all been best friends for years and at the end of this summer, just before they all move away for college or some bullshit,  they decide to go on a week long fishing trip booked by Holly’s father, whom she hasn’t seen in years but sends her messages every so often. Holly’s been afraid of the water since she was a little girl and is facing her fears. They arrive at the boat and Captain Torture is there to meet them. “Har har, it’s only a name. Get ready for the trip of a life time,” he says upon first meeting the group. Continue reading →

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Aug 17 2012
Movie Movie Podcast

Movie Movie Podcast #13: The Still Bourne Legacy

bourne legacy french poster

Were you there for our first ever LIVE podcast? It happened just a few hours ago. If you missed it, or if you want a memento of your experience at the show, we’ve recorded it for you and we’re posting it right now! That’s right! Join Peter, Russ, Alex, the crowd at The Creek  and the Cave in Long Island City and myself as we discuss The Bourne Legacy. Recorded live at The Creek and the Cave on August 16th 2012.

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Aug 13 2012
Movie Movie Podcast

Movie Movie Podcast #12: Total Revolution ’12

Welcome to Movie Movie Podcast, where we make all of your dreams come true.  Well plus or minus 40% of your dreams will come true. In fact just come in with an open mind, a couple of dreams to choose from and we’ll see what we can make happen. Join Alex, Peter, Russ and myself as we explore the intricate workings of the mind in Total Recall ’12 and freak out some squares while making our voices heard about Step Up: Revolution. As a bonus, Russ gives us a run down of the previous three Step Up movies and Pete becomes furious. Recorded on August 12th 2012.

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Aug 10 2012
Fake Movie Friday

Fake Movie Friday: Knockout Nanny

Did you ever see Mr Nanny? Yeah I still watch it all the time. Kind of like that. Or The Pacifier, etc etc etc.

I present for your reading pleasure: Knockout Nanny

Julie has been the nanny for the Henderson’s for 5 years now. She’s 29, handles 13 year old Niles and the 7 year old Amanda very well. They both love her and she them. Mr Henderson, Jeffry (played by Hank Azaria), works long hours for the government on top secret projects. Mrs Henderson, Rachel, is an alcoholic, but a lovable, competent one who has more hilarious situations than disastrous.

There are scenes of Julie chasing the kids around, getting them ready for school, Rachel is passed out at the kitchen table and Jeff is running out the door. Julie is able to drive the kids to school, go grocery shopping and keep the Henderson’s life sane. She is also a black belt in muay thai kickboxing. We see scenes of her in her gym training with her master, Jin. Continue reading →

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Aug 08 2012
Movie Movie Podcast

Movie Movie Podcast #11: Batman Rises and Returns, The Dark Knight Begins Forever, and Robin

the-dark-knight-rises-poster

James Gordon Jr.: Why’re they running, Dad?
Lt. James Gordon: Because we have to chase them.
James Gordon Jr.: They didn’t do anything wrong.
Lt. James Gordon: Because they’re the podcast Gotham deserves, but not the one it needs right now. So we’ll hunt them. Because they can take it. Because they’re not our heros. They’re long winded guardians, pretentious protectors. Semi-dark knights.

Join Russ, Peter, Alex and myself as we get down, dirty and spoilery with The Dark Knight Rises. Recorded on August 1st 2012 (I think) at The Goo! Studios in NYC by our good friend, broducer and resident opulent vigilante Matt “my nipples are actually that hard, it’s not the suit” Giordano

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Aug 03 2012
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Fake Movie Friday

Fake Movie Friday: Cereal Killer

This weeks movie I was trying to do something clever, but ended up not. Toucan was supposed to be both the detective and killer but  anyway, without further ado:

Cereal Killer

Toucan Sam get’s a call at 9 in the morning. There’s been a triple homicide. He arrives at the scene to find Snap, Crackle and Pop brutally murdered. The rest of the officers are all humans, and he is just walking around doing his job. He inspects the area but there doesn’t appear to be any evidence left behind.

He heads back to the office to start his write up, and in the middle of him finishing the paper work he receives another call. The Yummy Mummy was found hanging from a lamp-post outside of his condo. Sam heads over and starts to inspect. He finds a Cap’n Crunch whistle on the ground and decides it’s time to visit the Cap.

Continue reading →

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Aug 01 2012
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Movie Movie Podcast

Movie Movie Podcast #10: Mega Mega Cast #2: The Rise and Fall of Magic Ted and the Amazing, Savage Spider-Man From Mars

I know you missed hearing our voices, but fear no more! We are BACK! Because we have been gone for so long we decided to do a couple of movies for you, all at once. That’s right it’s time for Mega Mega Cast #2: The Rise and Fall of Magic Ted and the Amazing, Savage Spider-Man From Mars. Join Russ, Peter, Alex and myself as we discuss Ted, Magic Mike, The Amazing Spider-Man, and Savages. Recorded on July 16th (I think?) at The Goo Studios in NYC. Mixed, edited and everything else by friend, bro-ducer, #1 super fan, and ex stripper Matt “yes, that actually is a banana in my pocket” Giordano.

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

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